Why I Was Wrong about Thanksgiving and Christmas

An Unequal Comparsion

This post started out as a comparison between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Specifically, it was going to show why our national Turkey Day was a better holiday than Xmas for a few reasons. The post was going to point out that even though Christmas was at its core an important spiritual holiday, most Americans treated it like a secular holiday only with more decorations and gifts.

I was going to make the argument the season had become too materialistic. To prove my point, I was going to talk about how we worry about getting our Christmas newsletters out on time and ensuring our work gifts are appropriate or if we have an equal number of gifts for our kids. Instead of the Christmas spirit, the post was going to ask if perhaps we should call it “retail spirit” or even “Amazon-spirit” given the amount we shop online every year.

The writing would still have mentioned all the right things about Christmas, but then discuss how many of its positive elements have become tarnished by commercialization and “secularization.” I would have then argued Thanksgiving outranked Christmas as a holiday and shown you how.

Thanksgiving is Simpler

I would have explained the Thanksgiving holiday is about two things: family and food. The post would have then shown that because of its simplicity and message, Americans of all religions, ethnicities, and backgrounds can celebrate it together.

I would have gone on to write Thanksgiving is one of the few celebrated holidays that unifies our entire country. While the 4th of July is a celebration of our independence, Thanksgiving is a celebration of our collective family. I would have made mention Thanksgiving permeates all American sub-cultures and in fact helps bind us together because it is a uniquely American holiday.

The post would declare that while Thanksgiving is a secular holiday, it has taken on an almost spiritual connotation. The fourth Thursday in November is inviolable. It would then point out the day after Turkey Day, Black Friday, was the demarcation line between the Christmas season and the rest of year. Sadly, I would write, the commercialization of the season broke out of its containment, and now we’ve not even finished our tryptophan-induced naps before we start looking for seasonal savings.

The article would have also compared the expectations we levy on one another during both holidays. At Christmas, most of us expect to receive gifts, and we know gifts are expected from us. Conversely, during Thanksgiving, the most we expect is our family brings the appropriate casserole or pie (Costco pumpkin pie please).

Thanksgiving’s Hidden Meaning

There is a quiet back-story to Thanksgiving we don’t often acknowledge that the article would have discussed. It is a message that should resonate with Americans of every stripe. When the Pilgrims and early settlers sailed from European ports, they did so with no expectation of returning. They were driven by a host of reasons including a chance at a better life. The article would argue that is a vital American character trait.

A couple of years ago, our family visited Plymouth, Massachusetts where we saw Plymouth rock and the Mayflower replica. Both the rock and the ship were underwhelming in their size, but massive in their significance. Seeing them both drove home the simple point that our birth as a Nation was messy and convoluted, yet somehow the result was a great country capable of immense goodness. Again, this is the power of Thanksgiving the post was going to argue.

As I worked on the first few drafts of the post detailing why Thanksgiving was better than Christmas I got stuck. Perhaps it was just writer’s block, but then I came to realize it was because I didn’t really believe what I was trying to prove. Yes, Thanksgiving is a beautiful celebration of family and food that all Americans enjoy together. However, the message of Christmas remains powerful in spite of being buried underneath growing materialism and secularism.

Christmas Remains Crucial

I had to admit I love many things about Christmas time –  the traditions, the music, and the pervading festive spirit. Christmas lights and Christmas movies are favorites as well. I especially appreciate the increased civility that seems to settle upon our busy lives during Christmas. People seem to be quicker to smile with a “Merry Christmas” in spite of the heavier traffic and longer lines in the stores.

I also came to realize my “pro-Thanksgiving” stance was really in opposition to the negative aspects of Christmas, but not the meaning of the holiday itself.

Instead of writing what was wrong with Christmas and why Thanksgiving was a “better” holiday, the truth of the matter is the Christmas message of hope and love win the day. As a church-going family and God-followers, we believe in the miracle of the holiday, not as a fairy tale, church folklore, or sweet story. We believe in the account of the birth of the baby Jesus. I realize this is increasingly counter-cultural, but so is the real Christian message of faith, hope, and love.

Sadly, Christmas HAS become more materialistic. Yet, this just means we have to be more intentional in celebrating its meaning. The challenge for all of us in suburbia is not to let the wonderful celebration of the holiday get crowded out by the negative aspects of the season.  With that in mind, here are ten simple ways to help us all do just that.

Ten Ways to Keep the True Meaning of Christmas Alive

1. Remind one another why we give gifts.

2. Emphasize the importance of family and friends.

3. Discuss the blessings and positive things your family has experienced this year.

4. Focus on the intangible parts of the holiday – faith, hope, and love.

5. Look for ways to express charity to those less fortunate during the season.

6. Write down your individual and family goals for the impending New Year.

7. Brainstorm with your family ways you can prevent being caught up in the holiday’s commercialization.

8. Author letters to each other describing how and why you are thankful for them.

9. Smile genuinely at people when you tell them “Merry Christmas.”

10. Remember the spiritual meaning of the holiday.

Closing Thoughts

Christmas should be a wonderful time of year for everyone. It can be painful for those who have lost loved ones during the year or for those families whose loved ones are overseas or working on the holidays. Ironically, for these families, the true meaning of Christmas often becomes more vivid than ever.

For those of us who get the privilege of being with our loved ones during the Christmas holiday, I hope it is a beautiful celebration of family and faith.  Merry Christmas and thank you for honoring me with your time.

Merry Christmas Dads!

Cheers,

Jeff